I am angry, scared and O so frustrated----at MYSELF!!   I have been in a self made denial for several weeks now.  I quit my job that ended up only paying min wage---no big deal right?   I told myself---"I can certainly make that on my OWN!  I am smart, creative, enjoy talking to people and I have a work ethic bar none!  So there is NO way I can fail".  I have spent the past few weeks trying desperately  to evolve from a worker bee to  a queen bee----in other words---"faking it till i make it".   I have read reports, visited countless websites,  gone to several business meetings----in other words---I confused myself.   Strangely enough I found while in that state of confusion and misguidance---i ALLOWED  alot of my old demons to pop their ugly heads up and start spewing their negative bile at me!!   I,  all the sudden couldn't walk up to someone and talk with them.  I,  of ALL people was at a loss of words!!  I have been in the restaurant/bar business for 30 yrs and a telemarketer for 10----I have talked with countless people over the years---of ALL walks of life!!  I am now silent???

 I understand it---just don't know how to FIX it!!!   I had never spoken to anyone about business on my OWN behalf before!!  When I NEEDED my voice the MOST---I was silent.  When you can't trust yourself---WHERE do you go?  I know the obvious answer to that question---your higher power.   BUT if you don't trust yourself enough that what you hear your higher power telling you----THEN where do u go???   THAT is my question!!     I have people counting on me.  I can't let them down.